Cheaters Always Get Busted

My brother owns a convenience store and recently called me to tell me about an incident he encountered. He sells hot hands hand warmers even in the summer which is not that unusual because he has several patrons that work in cold storage facilities and use them year round.

He had a customer come in recently and ask for some hot hands. My brother proceeded to ask him which cold storage facility he worked at, he replied none. He said he used the hot hands to pass a drug test. He pours clean urine in a bottle and then puts the hot hands against the bottle and tapes it to his leg. By doing this, he is able to keep the urine warm. He went on to say he’s used this method multiple times to thwart a drug test (by the way- he does not test at First Choice!). He even said that on occasion the temperature became too hot and scalded his leg.

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A couple of years back we had a father bring his son in for a drug test; we do lots of drug testing for parents but this guy’s son looked to be in his mid-twenties. The son gave us a urine specimen we would not accept, I do not remember exactly why we wouldn’t accept it but I am sure it was out of temperature range, or we there was some other factor that led us to believe it did not come out of his body. The father insisted he give another specimen; I am not sure why and it always baffles me when a parent is insistent on having a positive drug test result from us when they just got their answer when their child (or adult child) tried to cheat.

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What’s the best was to beat a drug test??? Find someone who is drug free and sort of looks like you and get them to be your impersonator.

We had this happen at our clinic, a mother came in impersonating her daughter. They were quite clever and had somehow electronically placed the mother’s picture on the driver’s license of the daughter. I’m not sure how they did that but the license looked real. The collection was proceeding normally but our collector had a 6th sense that something was just not right, particularly when he wrote the birthdate of the donor of the lab chain. That’s when it hit him that something was afoul.

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What’s 2 ounces of clean pee worth??

We recently had a truck driver come in for a random drug test. Truckers fall under DOT (department of transportation), a Federal Government organization that regulates the trucking industry as well as airlines, public transportation, coast guard, railroads, and pipeline workers. All safety sensitive employees who work in these industries are mandated to take random drug and alcohol tests. We see more positive drug tests for DOT workers who are “surprised” with a random test than we do if they are taking a Pre-Employment test. Pre-Employment applicants can simply stop using drugs long enough to get a negative test result.

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